she wanted to know

She wanted to know and I was afraid to answer.
I thought I knew the answer, in a way.

" you love it " was the question - and yes.

" but do you know what it is ? "

I quess that was the question - and what was my answer ...

Well, I guess I was thinking - it's just a bit of a theory .. sort of
a weird - transendental thought maybe . Was it weird, twisted,
or just made up on the spot - for luck or what have you.

I was thinking more about it though - the revolving / rotating
dynamics of love, sex, money, power, control.

You sure can make up a lot from that - can't you ---
Pistons grabbing the air, sheer forces, pitching and biting
at the surfaces. Grabbing the air.

Calm down.

I looked out. It was a clear day. Calmly then - what is the answer?
Wasn't it something about knowing and existing? Existing for
a reason - because of some one, for some one - or doing something for
a reason - for some one. I know, I exist, for a reason, for some one.

I looked out and I thought some more -
I could fight for it - like fighting for the air -
about I want. I want it.

" It you say --- and you say it so calmly. "

" And who has it ? "

Well, the it keeps getting passed back and forth ...

Does the buck - stop here ? You think you can pin point it?

" Not routinely. ", as I thought - " but, sometimes. "

" The buck will stop, I am sure when it's damn and
ready to. I guess that's truly all I know for sure. "

" Oh, okay then - you can get away with this crap for now" - as
if it were the 80's , " but sooner or latter , Mr. Smarty Pants
the buck will catch up to you - and I'll laugh then, just because I can,
and just because it want to. "

" Yes, " , I said " I know. "

And it all goes back again, rotating on the wheel of
sex, love, money, power, and control. Maybe it's
just good and bad.

Doesn't that make you dizzy ????
Some days yes and some days no.

It's a key. The key fits into the lock.
The lock opens - wazaam -
Somebody - shuts the lock and you
go through it all again.

Wazaam...

And if that doesn't work - well -
just sit there and try and think of a better way.

It seems then - like on most days, it all gets pushed back
to why. Because. Why? - because. Because - be why.

Mysterious. Because, I thought I knew.